Nothing makes me feel better than to trick people into reading this far more frequently than i update on the goings on of my life. just kidding. i know from experience with tre's blog and ro's blog that people who don't update their blogs are hated. so, i guess i appreciate you all not overtly hating me. must disguise the hate.
But seriously, where to start. part of the reason for the delay in blogging is due to the fact that i am an ass, and i fear i must include some proof of that in today's blog. so, without further ado....

Some of you may remember that yvette girl who i took to japan with me. we nicknamed her "Yeti", (and by we i mean cami.) well, i'll skip to the end of the story right away: i broke up with her. we started dating on the 23rd or 24th of july, and i broke up with her on the 25th of august. over the phone. i deserve multiple punches for that, i know. my reasons for breaking up with her are, i think, good enough, but that doesn't change the fact that i feel like a huge oaf who was given something delicate and breakable, and, despite my best intentions, i broke it anyways. yvette really liked me. and i really wish that i had waited until near the end of our time together to talk to her about dating, instead of starting on the way over. in the plane i figured we were gonna end up dating anyways, so might as well hang out in japan with my girlfriend, instead of with someone who i have an ambiguous, almost-dating relationship with. but, in my selfishness, we started dating before we should have, and i was remaining aloof and unattached while as a result of my actions yvette was getting more and more attached. in the end, though, i realized that she was infinitely more committed to me than i was to her, and i realized that continuing the relationship would be really bad for both of us- for her because she deserves someone who is as crazy about her as she is about them, and for me because i would continue to have a love life that came to me, one which i would have to put very little effort into. at first, anyways. i have to give yvette credit- i don't think she would have put up with my apathetic affections for much longer. you go girl.

Well, that's said and done. it's kinda a sore subject, mostly because yvette is so wonderful i wonder if i've done the right thing. and i know i've been an ass either way, which doesn't help. but let's see what news isn't sad, depressing, or serious:
Me and brents, the 19 year old brother, watched some fireworks on sunday. turns out they shoot them off from a golf course that isn't too well secured, if you know what i mean. so we sat in the middle of the green on a golf course we broke into watching them shoot fireworks off like 200 yards away. they have these gargantuan ones that shake the earth and sky, and the burning embers were falling around us. serisouly, any closer and we would have needed earplugs. it's going to be tough being a youth pastor, i think. me and brents can get away with doing stuff like that, but the kids are gonna want to do stuff like that and i'll have to say "guys, now let's be mature and responsible. what do you think your parents would say if they found out we broke into a golf course and had an awesome time watching the fireworks of the apocalypse?" when, really, deep down inside, i will want more than anything to do it with them. like spitting fireballs: it's fun for me to do, but i have to pretend that i think it's a horrible idea so the kids won't do it. at least, not while i'm watching or in charge.

Speaking of the kids, my youth first youth group is this sunday!! it's the middle school group, which has been called JAM (Jesus And Me) for years. i want to change it, but i'm coming up against some pretty stiff opposition. yesterday i went to CAJ (Christian Academy in Japan) to hang out with whoever i ran into. it's really scary for me, which is why i called someone to hang out with. for those of you who never stopped to examine my social style (shame on you)i do much better with situations where people come to me and be my friend. my introverted shyness really comes out when i'm in situations where i don't know very many people. it's actually really scary. good thing i'm a good faker. i hide my 50lb. shyness behind an outgoing, brash stick man. and if you can't fathom that metaphor, it's not my fault. the emperor clearly must have the greatest skills in english to create a metaphor like that.



an addendum:
while travelling the narrow passageways of shibuya station i found what can only be described as a photo journal of my love life about a year ago. the only reason it's worth talking about is that the girl i was interested in at that point ended up dating cami, who is not only not me, but is my younger brother. so, here's the first picture:

notice the horns? that's deidre for you. then, much to my obvious dismay, we have the second picture

no caption needed; the pictures say it all.

ah, hair care products. i will cry when the day comes that you are not a beacon of light in this dreary land, shining your truth about love from posters in busy train stations.